Tuesday, October 13, 2020

My latest tweets on @tosinbird



My main twitter account is @tosinbird, but I delete all the tweets every month or so, mostly out of habit, and because I don't feel the need to save what are essentially bursts of re-tweeting activity, that although time-focused (I mean if you consider them in the short time that they were made, you can find a theme and/or understand the tweets), are certainly from haphazard and diverse topics and styles over the long term. 
 But also, maybe it's to hide, for example when one has said something political for which one could be witch-hunted someday? (Because human beings are crazy.) 

 But mostly because I deleted all before and got in the habit of doing it. I mean, because my tweets, being worthless when they've passed their use-date, deserve to be deleted. And perhaps by twitter's nature many old tweets are worthless too. Although collectively, this is not true, and it is a good thing that the twitter archive exists, a gargantuan library of gibberish and some gold.  

Anyway, I have this secondary twitter account @REALbubbler where tweets are more permanent; I have never deleted all here. So, to make this blog post, I let @realbubbler echo my latest tweets on @tosinbird so I could embed the more permanent objects. I hope you enjoy the mini-project.








This is my "pinned tweet" at @REALbubbler. The one that I've kept at the top of my page/feed for some years to give it more prominence and help people notice my product - the poetry book.



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I just created even more tweets (re-tweets): about protests to End SARS, and other matters.  Please click and see the array.  


Saturday, September 12, 2020

I feel lousy. I think post-period dehydration is one way to describe this?

The great thing is I just ate.  (I have made a habit of never taking food for granted, or the small privileges like time-freedom.)  The other great thing is that I did not eat all of the food - the half that was signalling to me that it would make me feel terrible.  Another great thing is that I'm free to drink water, rest, or do whatever I want.  The half of the food that is good is the boiled yam.  The half of the food that is poison is egg-sauce.  I just ate the yam, and the salt on it felt great on my tongue, and the starch in it is familiar and soothes whatever emotional problems I may have.  The egg though, even before it was made, the kitchen smells were annoying me.  And you know I love food and would often just eat the food with joy, but today I had some sense and threw the egg thing away without even tasting it.  I could see ginger fibers in it, and the crazy kitchen smells had included onions, and I'm not talking about moderate quantities here.  And the physiological state I'm in now is probably low blood or something, yesterday was the last day of a mildly lively menstrual "period"/flow, not far out of ordinary, just that it felt like it had started a full day before it started enough that I assumed it was and used a tampon that I didn't need - I usually do that "after" the flow has started, yes?, and then I had PMS during the first day of bleeding instead of the day before the first day - by PMS I don't mean there is pain and cramping, just that I might act bitchy - in a text message perhaps, with a boy perhaps - and not know why until the day after when I say hahaha I did that yesterday and it was definitely pms.  Anyway, the other reason I would call this period a little lively is that say the usual flow is sorta normal or heavy in the first 24 hours, on day two it may be normal then it fades away like it's giving up, then it sorta comes back for a semi-normal but usually light fadeout on day three, I think?  But this time, it may have been that day two was a full day like day one, I think.  Either way, the thing I do not want now is onions and garlic and ginger or such nonsense while I rebalance.  When there was (very present) coronavirus, yes, definitely onions, and I have treated myself to another onionsvaganza extravaganza even recently who knows maybe I was getting a cold - these things happen almost by instinct.  And maybe by instinct my mother is needing to infuse her life with these aromas and foods right now whereas I already have a headache and (right on cue, right now I notice my leg and foot tingling painfully, which relates to hampered blood flow) well the headache for me is a very rare - very rare - occurrence and I noticed it one or two hours ago but it's half-gone now, and what I'm saying is low blood, hence no need for the blood-drain foods right now, and - smart girl me - I resisted the urge to eat anyway.  

And I was also wondering why I do not speak up.  But after writing this I see that I do not speak up because it is not clearcut and easy.  These items are not unmitigated poisons, they are medicines actually, for the right person at the right time.  I am not one hundred percent against them, in fact I recommend them to myself when an antiviral need arises.  I am not forever and always responding negatively to these things, and my response to them is not clearly negative like, I don't drop dead or anything.  Who knows, maybe if I spoke up, it would turn out that the food feels bad for somebody else and the overall effect would be to solve a shared problem, although I suspect that the food is very good for my mother and possibly good for somebody else, and maybe in some different pathways it is very good for me as well.  Also, I suspect that (I should be looking to try asking, not suspecting - eyeroll) the somebody else's don't care about how their function might be changing in such seemingly minor ways in response to food.  It must be something going on with my mum, I mean in her body; we had been out of this for a while now and eating well, but now we're back.  (Edited one hour later: Now I remember, yes, she went to the dentist five days ago, she had a procedure - had a whole tooth removed, and has been taking medicine since and also likely managing pain, without showing signs outwardly.  And a piece of the mystery is solved!)

Now I feel well, no headache.  I'll eat a little more yam, drink a bit more water.  One of these days I'll buy myself some of the foods I need.  Actually, I already have stuff around the house that I like.  I made a spice paste weeks ago - contains Indian-style dried beans and spices aka masala powder - that I haven't been using.  Actually, the first thing I thought this morning had been to warm a can of cream of chicken soup for myself.  I'm no longer in the mood for that now, but you can see the direction my appetite is leaning - chunky foods, fats, skins - chicken skin, fish skin, creamy, normal, a little salt and sugar not excess - up from my usually close to zero salt and sugar lol, hmmm, it just occurred to me now that the medicine I need is a bottle of tomato juice, that would rehydrate me right back to life...although it's easier to not go shopping now, since rest is medicine too, another thing I would want is like a cup-a-noodle thing - you know, with rice or noodles and spices and you do hot water with it to make a broth yummm the salty spices at the end make you feel your joy restored, ... and maybe cheetos.    

Even before the period though, and don't read this if you don't like "too-much information" about bodily functions, I'd noticed 1. pooparella, as in I don't normally shit/poopoo/"use the toilet" often, I poopoo infrequently in normal life, but I noticed I poo-poo'd a few times, maybe once daily a few days in a row, not that I was ill or that it was diarrhoeal or anything, I attributed it to my having eaten a lot of granola (raw grain, oats stuff) and I'm sure there was another reason.  And it occurred to me that I should eat more things like granola, and that such things make me happy, and that although I love milk and milk products, my body was probably not liking it.  Guess what, thanks to the yam, and the water, I'm due to poopoo again now.  Nice.  I hope I don't become an average poopoo-er, I was proud of my identity as a no-poop soldier.  Hahaha.     2. The other thing I noticed was a ginger chunk, in my food some days ago but I just ate the food anyway but I wasn't happy about it but maybe forgot about that.  3. Also I'd been feeling dehydrated for many days, like for instance, I'd been cracking my joints/bones - how do you say it - not only in my feet, ankles and so on, but also now in strange places back, shoulers, neck, hips, if I'm remembering this correctly.  Terror: does that mean I'll have bad posture when I'm old?  
After this post, I'll be more aware and rehydrate. The things I'm writing about may be relatively minor shifts in a body's program.  Also, I assume that they are shifts for the better, even though in reality they may be neutral.  
The weather is back to normal, yippee.  We have rain, we have sun, and the incredible cold of the past months seems to be over - it was maybe 2*Centigrade below normal daily range of 27 degrees +/- 4, but for a sensitive babe like me, that is cold at night.  (Editing one hour later: it is still cold.)  Soon I'll start to feel uncomfortable with the heat.  Hmmm, should I remove these curtains?  They were nice when it was cold, but now I want nature and ventilation, and maybe that is what my body is trying to tell me...I need fresh air?  YES.  and more light.  Adjust to the changing weather and throw the curtains open?  yes to that too.  Because they are linked, how you're breathing (and I think I don't breathe very well because my body is protesting the nonsense air quality essentially of the world so it just tries to operate without air) and your metabolism, your blood activeness and your general hydration levels.   And digestion and mental function.  I'm stopping now.  One Love.  
 
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Friday, September 04, 2020

Baby-name consultation

The boy-twin names you should totally use now: Kendrick and Chadwick.  
The girl-twins, obvvviously, should be Venus and Serena.  

In Yoruba culture, twins automatically get the names Taiwo and Kehinde.  
The child born after them is named Idowu, which also works for the third-born of triplets.    

Well, if you need a baby name, anywhere in the world, I guess I can help you?  CONTACT. 

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Monday, August 31, 2020

Caine Prize, Booker, Commonwealth, NLNG Nigeria Prize...

When am I going to read all these books (or short stories)  
and not just the final winners but also the finalists/shortlisted like I once used to do.  

and the PDF books on my laptop, and the ones I'm halfway through right now... 
and the small piles of books on the arm of this chair 
and the books that I have not bought or the ones I bought and lost? 
and the re-reads!  

Mmmm, I look forward to a beautiful life.  

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Monday, August 24, 2020

Meaningfulness, senselessness, and dance.

Three years in, 
it turns out that:  
OMMMMM
and 
 
Let's Face The Music, And Dance.  🎡🎢🎢
Year One and Two here: It was always dance.  

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Sunday, August 16, 2020

Words, like idiocracy

Sturm und Drang - as we now live in a world of children.    
Doom and Gloom - a different kind of vibe.  

I'm looking forward to watching this famously idiotic movie.  

It better not disappoint.  

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Friday, July 24, 2020

Dark humour

I've watched this so many times, and shared it a few times...
It's about how different personality types (the 4-letter /16 personalities /Myers-Briggs) handle the pandemic-apocalypse.  
Tell me.  
Is it funny?  True?  A little weird?  

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Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Not saying I'm going to post daily - I'm NOT - but here's another quick one

I claim to hate cellphones but my phone finally gave up the ghost this morning and by early afternoon I had gone off to try to get it repaired.  In between I had an online event/meeting/session about education in Lagos.  If my sister hadn't gone and got separate internet at home I would have been unable to join in the call since my smartphone was dead.  So I joined the call on my laptop then went for a walk and my repair guy said what was wrong and that he couldn't fix it but told me what to do and so on.  I normally would not do a post like this one that says (almost says, I'll skip that part) where I will be tomorrow because I'm not comfortable with the security risks.  That said, haha.  
Meanwhile I saw another sister that was on a videocall with my sister-at-home and that was nice, and she told me that she felt connected (I think was the word she used) to me because she had read my last post.  Yes, I have sisterzzz, plural. 

People who write minutiae, how do they do it?  Yes, I know how they do it, I did it in a novella and so on, with close-ups on people's lives, but I don't do it in my life - sweet God, just sit here and tell you rubbish about: what I ate and who has corona and how I liked the meeting and who gave me some money to try and repair the phone and details about how I asked the phone guy what his specialty was, and he said iPhones and Samsung phones to which I replied that I had honestly forgotten that I didn't possess a high-end phone, it's true.  Oh my, oh me.  Carrying my cheap ass phone around trying to get it repaired, and also my cheap ass second laptop which has a motherboard issue.  
What I do know about my phone is that there are even way cheaper smartphones than mine, swear to God, like they have some things like internet browsers and downloads and music players but they're ... ok I don't actually know sha.  But I know that the security guys, people working low income (aboki is not the perfect word to use here, political correctness, even though it's not a mean word) they all have phones, some of them large-ish phones, but they don't have the range of normal apps available to them.  I should check and learn more about that.  
Now to talk about my second laptop, I'm sad to see it go, but it always did have heat-management problems and considering that I bought it for very little way back when, and got to use it quite a bit esp when I had jobs in recent years that needed you to bring a laptop to work, so of course I lazily kept my little cheap laptop on-site and didn't have to carry heavy load about.  Like, the work is not even that serious.  The most serious part of some of those jobs was the acting serious.  LOL.  Or maybe I missed the point of the job(s).  Also used it when this laptop I'm using right now was down, for example earlier this year.  Also in the past I sometimes used it when I felt like taking a laptop to my food place to chill, sometimes I took both and now I can't remember why; (UPDATED one day later: I remember now - to charge all my devices when there was a prolonged power outage) and also sometimes when I had the back-in-the-day teaching job (which I somehow consider more serious) and did not want the weight of my main laptop and felt sure that I only needed to show something minor that baby-laptop could handle.   And sometimes when I needed two laptops, especially I think before I had all the smart-phone stuff going; say main laptop had crashed and I needed to study online how to restore it to life.  

O, Baby-laptop, I will try to save your ass.  You have value to me. 
I paid less than 20k (when the exchange rate was about 160 naira) 
 
And it occurred to me as I walked back home today that I was anxious about the future because I had one laptop and no second laptop, and what would happen if...if, I mean, main laptop is ten years old now, and, I don't know?  And I tried to tell myself something from the Bible, that I should "be anxious for nothing."  The likely thing I will do with Baby-Laptop is dispose of it - the repair guys buy it, I understand, for close to zero, while I ask them to remove the hard drive first, or somehow remove the browsers and whatever few personal files I may have saved on it - or risk having the next user just open it and have access to my email and all that.  You would think I actually had stuff to protect, the way I care about security lapses.  Hahaha.    


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Raw-blogging

It's time for me to exceed my former standards in honesty.  It's time to try blogging that strains toward a deeper honesty, or to try rawer posts for a while.  

Raw things on my mind: 
One of my blogs won't post to facebook anymore.  It is very annoying.  At first it was maybe all of my blogs, then I complained and then it was just one.  That one - NewsBuka - has been banned for several months now and I must have complained a dozen times.  

I'll return with more, uh, info.  It will be boring stuff like how I once again did the Values Exercise, and how today I got the name for my next poetry collection, and how...that's all for now.


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Thursday, June 11, 2020

Speaking of skin-colour, let's ask horse-lovers.

Common Horse Coat Colors from TheHorse.com :  "Horses come in a variety of vivid coat colors, ranging from solid and static to multifaceted and ever-changing. These coat colors are controlled by complex genetics."  They are described as bay, chestnut, black, dun, gray, roan, ...pinto, appaloosa, palomino, buckskin, seal-brown, ...  More from equine-world.co.uk and Even More from wikipedia/equine_coat_color

What are some of your favourite "colours"?  

~slideshow~

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Wednesday, June 03, 2020

Micah Javier Johnson. He eloquently and elegantly expressed his view that Black Lives Matter.

Say his name or shut the f* up.  


Share this with former US Presidents Barack Obama.  William J. Clinton.  George W. Bush.  All male by the way.  

Which is why everything starts over again today.  F* the constitution.  F* all f*ing pieces of paper that cause more harm than good.  I am the female president of the United States of America.  I don't know who the male president is, I guess you could be.  We're starting over.  

Oh, and happy birthday Rafa Nadal.  

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Friday, May 15, 2020

play-play











Now I just have to conquer this Pacman.

Announcement: Happy Taurus season.  
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Friday, May 01, 2020

the perfect moo-oo-d

'tis the season to be sunny 🌞 🌞 🌞








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Thursday, April 02, 2020

Don't intubate

Well, what should a doctor do instead?  Just watch people die?

I'm here studying some of the ways the conditions around treatment might be creating greater coronavirus/covid-19 burden.  So far, there is no cure for the disease, just handling the symptoms to hopefully keep patients alive.  So let's keep patients alive.

Steps One, Two, Three:
Don't get the virus, or don't get very sick.
Follow the GREAT PUBLIC HEALTH MESSAGING to wash your hands with soap frequently like a psycho, and to observe social distancing as much as possible staying away from people who may be infected and staying away from people because of course you yourself may be infected and with covid-19 you're spreading the virus even before you develop the symptoms like fever and coughs.  Read about viral shedding, I don't understand it but it is gross.  :-)  Now, the germs are out there, and if you encounter the virus you want to be in the majority that gets away with mild or moderate disease, so throughout this crazy pandemic period you should really take care of yourself, eat well, sleep and rest more than ever, enjoy that hot chicken soup or lemon honey tea, or even do the steam inhale things, stay hydrated, gargle salt, clean your nostrils with soap etc etc.  Oh Lord, it's exhausting.  Glad it's not forever.

It's not forever, in part because in some months or years there will hopefully be a vaccine.  Also because there are experiments (known as trials) going on with existing medicines (the malarial ones, the one from ebola, etc etc) to understand their effect on this disease - no they are not very effective or you would have been informed by the health authorities to use them.  Scientists are working...you are welcome to join the various efforts. 

Steps Four, Five, Six:
But in the meantime, the coronavirus disease is a killer that has caused quick respiratory-related death for some people, just like that.  And so there must be a medical response.  But the people around all these sick people then get sick, and it seems they get it worse than other people too.  Basically, doctors are at risk.  Then you start to try to understand why doctors are at increased risk, and you also try to understand how these viruses are finding lungs to infect and all that...let's try to shorten the story by quoting:

1.
from, a picture in The Washington Post, March 23, 2020: What the structure of the coronavirus can tell us.  (I didn't include the copy-paste the actual picture because it's probably a copyright violation to do so.)  Washing our hands is good advice.  But it's not the only weapon we have...

2. This paper that says up the temperature, dump the cool air-conditioning, and raise the humidity.  A more detailed discussion of the question is here (BBC: Will warm weather really kill off covid-19?).  Short answer, not really, not sure, or not as much as social distancing will. 
In Lagos, we've had roughly these conditions, naturally, and one prays that we will therefore be spared a great coronavirus outbreak.  Can we replicate this "weather" in the hospitals of New York and Barcelona?  Yes, we must try.
(It just occured to me to say: please don't use the heater in your building to a very high level in an effort to dry yourself into a prune - you'll make yourself ill and lower your immunity.  Please don't do stupid things.  Natural heat with humidity and ventilation is a different thing than using your HVAC as a dryer.)  Ask an air-conditioning professional, HVAC engineer, and facilities manager to help.

Please click on each of these to learn more.
Building managers, especially for hotels and hospitals, please click for technical information

More great tips from facilityexecutive.com

3. But also, we must find where we're actively multiplying infection rates and stop doing that or even start cleaning the air, a keyword I've seen is aerosolization, which causes more spread and more disease.  WHO is looking into understanding this.  Engineers can help.

This is very important to consider: How to END coronavirus spread by cleaning the air coming out of hospitals.  There may be multiple ways to do that - like specifically disinfecting areas around isolation centers? 
Like I said, people are studying the situation and evolving strategies:




This thing is highly infectious.  Dealing with it may seem frustrating.  Don't be frustrated.  We'll figure it out.

4. Don't intubate.  Now here I sort of don't know what I'm talking about.  But it's invasive, with risks to the carer and the patient.  Just as the system for giving supportive oxygen produces aerosols that make more patients. 

That is why I'm suggesting a pause here to consider:  Can we avoid getting to the point where we need a wild number of these extreme procedures?    (Oh yeah, isn't that what everybody has been trying to do?)
Don't let the viruses live.  
Don't let the virus find your face.  
Don't let the virus get cosy inside you.  
Don't let the virus end you.  
Don't let the viruses spread.  
Working together, we can achieve our aim.

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Saturday, February 29, 2020

Bye-bye

I've been telling people not to panic about the corona virus thing, but I'm a little bit, well, sometimes, over-worried.

Just wash your hands, I guess.

And remember that even if you get the disease, you'll likely survive ... it's not bye-bye yet.

It's a viral disease, not primarily bacterial, so don't start popping antibiotics or the wrong medicines.  Instead, support your immune system with good food and rest and avoid exposure to the virus if you can.

If I was very old, I would probably take stricter measures to avoid coming in contact with the virus.  What are people doing?  What are your thoughts and suggestions?

Big respect to workers who are directly affected, and good luck to everyone.

What can we do to help?
#health

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Thursday, January 30, 2020

CNN ...

Vanessa Bryant posts on Instagram for the first time since Kobe's death (HERE)

Priest: Kobe Bryant sought redemption through his Catholic faith (HERE)



Also recently passed, our dearest Shirley.

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Thursday, January 02, 2020

Do you have a New Year resolution?

They're usually not my thing.  I usually resolve to be much the same as ever.
That said, I could work on creating the habit of exercising and the habit of (I'm not sure) not not having a job-type income-thingy. 

Aquagym:
I don't get enough exercise, since all I do is sit and read things.  Taking a sports/exercise class would bring some fun physical and social activity into my life.  I actually took a reasonably-inexpensive weekly yoga class late last year, a five-minute walk away, and it was good, so now I'm going to see if I can find (or request) another class, with a different form of exercise that I prefer, like dance or swimming or, like, aquagym.

Edu or Strategy or what?
If I had a job, coupled with needing to take a little public-transport (as opposed to door-to-door chauffeuring) and walking, I would not be complaining about needing to exercise.  Which brings me to - oh yeah, as always, it seems I once again acknowledge a need to get a job.  Except that I don't...  Many jobs actually don't need doing lol.  And many times I start on a job and find I have too quickly eliminated the need for the job, or for my income.
Which is actually a problem.
I mean, I could teach again?  (Yes, I plan to do that when I grow up, like, my 50s, 60s, ...)  I could work in education for more money somehow?
Well, I've been saying how I want to be on boards.  But there again, the problem.  Example, you see a way you could intervene to make things better, but notice that it should properly be the workforce taking ownership of the functions and not the egghead-board-of-outsiders, and you (hypothetically) find that the intervention to get the workforce up to speed is in the works, or not in the works and never going to be, or ... I mean, at some point, life is one huge shrug - whatever.    ( Alright, I'll express that in a more positive/hopeful way: work-life is one learning experience after the other?   See?  Positive - I earn, you gain, I learn.  )

Less ginger 
In other news, I just isolated the source of my biggest health problem - how I get dizziness and symptoms of low blood pressure all the time?  It's the excess of ginger in my food.  My mother has fallen in love with ginger and been adding chopped fresh ginger into everything everywhere all the time - hopefully we can stop.  She also used to love garlic and put it everywhere. Both of these things are potent blood thinners, like aspirin.     Lord have mercy.
FYI ginger is very good for you, just not good for me.
Actually, one time in the past 2 years or so, my mother had a doctor-recommended daily aspirin that I thought might be useless or harmful.  That's not what I said to her directly, I only suggested that she maybe observe the effect just in case she found it unnecessary.  It must be that these things don't harm her and actually offer her benefits.  I on the other hand keep feeling I need to thicken my blood so to speak, to add a little fat to my diet for instance - my brain gets hungry.  Now I need to tell her about the ginger and to try to feed myself better going forward.
I got vitamins the other day, bought a bottle of multivitamins - oh, yeah, maybe I should take a swig of that now.
I'm really happy to have figured out the ginger thing, I was starting to get worried that I'd damage my brain or something.  Now I have the hope of exploring foods that make me feel more robust and alright.

This whole blog post is cheesy.  It's time to dance.


(One hour later) My mother is back from work, and we've spent the past hour talking about food - ginger, garlic, and their amazing medicinal properties and side-effects.  She says that just for me, of course she's going to stop cooking with both.  I'm lucky, eh.

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Tuesday, December 17, 2019

Sunday, December 15, 2019

This year's picks :: Best music+video experiences of 2019

Baby by Joeboy (with the sequels) * Juice by Lizzo (that girl owned 2019) * Good Morning Riddim by Sarz  







Bonus: Previous lists
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Saturday, November 30, 2019

untitled

Every year I post my 'top 5' music+video experiences. 

My selections usually have
excellent-to-superlative music/sound,
an exemplary-or-masterful video,
and,
in the best cases,
both the song and the visuals work very well together. 

I'm working on this year's list - of maybe three items/songs/videos. 

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Wednesday, October 30, 2019

omg I'm discovering apps

I just tried this one called "Paint By Number" and painted my first picture.

It was a delightful experience (if you ignore the problems with apps, like how it stalled my phone on the first attempt to use it)

I'm going to do another one now.

And another one.

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Thursday, October 24, 2019

Legacies

Guess what I've been re-rocking?

Ice Prince - Jos To The World
Jesse Jagz - Royal Niger Company

J2TW was released 36 months ago, and I remember being astounded that this work would not get a lot of listens relatively, while for example Drake's work did get attention and make the creators money, and how that was just a function of ... oh well, I won't bore you with social justice talk.  You just grab the music for yourself and enjoy a dance-and-a-half. 

RNC from March 2014, well you know that album made my life lol.  It's sonic excellence, exuberant and brilliant work, and includes SDC Tec's "I don't spit on the mic, my guy, I baptize" which just "bursted my brain" again, even though I know the whole verse.  It's Tec's birthday today. 
As usual, Jesse is working on something new, even though he really doesn't owe us anything.   


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Saturday, October 19, 2019

Guess who is getting married?






Meanwhile,
Oct 12, 2019 - Several hashtags have been trending on Twitter on the premise of the wedding and the “sudden” return of Mrs. Buhari to the country to stop the ...
Here is the full story.

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Wednesday, October 16, 2019

Here are two beautiful words

1. ephemeral 
2. ethereal 

What do they mean? 

The first is brief in terms of time - here now and soon gone, while the second may be hard to pin down in terms of location or space. 

The first may be an attribute of concrete things, or in religious language "the things of this world" while the second may describe the things of God, or of Spirit. 

In the language of physics, the first represents the particle and the second is the wave... 
in other words, matter and light. 

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Wednesday, October 02, 2019

On the one hand, philosophical societies







If you love math(s),
one way of looking at this is, ah, ok, we can
integrate, I think, like subsume/embed the fractured parts in a higher-dimensional space where the parts cease to contradict each other.  In this case, interfaith.  What jurisprudence?  Work on one law that works for all.  Build an even bigger religion.  Or dump it entirely, to build a thing even bigger (in its capacity for consistency) than religion.   Philosophize ad nauseum.  We are human after all.
Or,
AND,
We can differentiate, ignore the larger shape to interest ourselves only in the edges, get hyperlocal and extremely granular, and that leads to something too, at least the edges get less bloody sharp.  In this case some hyperactive individual thing - a bet.  A bet.  Daily bets.  Dancing competition - no, can't do that, or can you do that?  Rap battle.  Tweet-battle.  Twitter wars.  Shopping.  Money, commerce.  Subdivide to meaninglessness.  We are human, after all.

Inspired by mathematics
I think what happens after you differentiate is that you can put together the results from the little bits to see the result for the whole.  This overall result may  not have a name, may not be easy to describe or possible to name, it may be discontinuous, inharmonious and messy, but for the application, it gets the job done.  Oh, and it can also be realized in a rather rote, uncreative, unthinking manner after the method is understood and implemented.  Also known as automation.  Here is the whole field of computational (i think differential equation solving, like say nonlinear solvers).  Or the whole field of just collecting grains of data and using AI to make decisions, rather than seeking to describe a whole thing, just subdivide, subdivide and let activity do the work.  
.
On the other hand, 
I think what happens after you integrate, no, I mean when you embed for the purpose of solving, 
for example I think using the "weak form" of a problem in (again, differential equations, advanced topics), 
but there are easier examples, like finding the roots of a simplest type of quadratic equation is hit-or-miss if you only know normal numbers but it's jokingly easy if you use complex numbers, 
or for example when you use a general, overall, average, or approximate idea of something to analyze it, that is, when you integrate (since averages are integrals)...
and there are advanced examples that probably have nice pictures, like: to make sense of the world in astronomy they had to come up with string theory which uses not three-dimensions but more - how many more?    
They'll tell you when they figure it out, looool



What happens when you embed, one advantage of the embedding thing is that the solving is easier, I mean, first you have to embed carefully and succesfully in a way that includes all the situations that you've been given - all the fractured parts - but now you have a simplified description which is another advantage actually; then at this point you have the great freedom of a bird's eye view that lets you see/find solutions, easy, easily, in this newly expanded framework, oh, everything is so easy; then you just have to select solutions that meet the restrictions of the original problem, real-world, constraints; those ideas/solutions that are most acceptable.   
You grab?  Understand?  



These mathematical methods are analogous to the philosophical concepts of
a. Transcendence and  b. Nihilism.
I think.  You think?




Roles for merchant-folks; roles for eggheads.  
Roles for party-folk; roles for stodgy-peeps.



Why is ego talking?

Whatever did Fatima say to Ali?

 Who are these people?   Can I watch them in a play? 




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Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Actual things that I did, saw, bought, and so on.

I remember this from my last post:
If I really mean to practise concreteness, one supporting practice could be to write in this blog daily for a while, recording actual things that I did, saw, bought, and so on.  A first-order, direct experience journal.  (There are no actual things or so it would seem.  Hmmm, maybe there are some. )
So here are some quick notes on such actual things:
I have actually been quite social.  We've just had a four-day weekend for Sallah, so everyone at home more.
I have really been quite social, come on!
I visited these people Monday, took a road trip to a meeting out-of-town on Tuesday, got a little sick with a cold by Thursday, also had a meeting and took public transport and walked back home and visited mum at work and met more people and she bought me plenty food and I found super-mild medicine at home to use for my cold.  First I tried once again to buy Panadol Cold and Catarrh, cata is such a hard word to spell, but I find they don't stock it anymore or who knows maybe they don't make it anymore, maybe it's too simple lol, too inexpensive, too common-sense.  
The medicine is called Lemisip - it has paracetamol like the equivalent of 1 tablet of Panadol and a dot of the actual cold medicine phenylephrine hydrochloride.  It's black-currant flavoured and you make it in a tea with hot water.  I've used it before but this time it was better because 1. I lowered the dose even more, used half of the sachet at a time - first half in the evening and the other half the next morning, and 2. I didn't drink a straight Lemisip tea, but a sweet and sexy full packet of ginger-lemon or was it ginger-honey tea with the half-sachet blackcurrant Lemisip in it.  Yummm.  It worked and without the pain-and-suffering aka side-effects.  I suspect it's not very good for your stomach.
I just put all that in small print because the main point of this post is to enumerate actions and concrete things, not ramble with details of cold medicine?  I guess.  I'll soon end this concreteness experiment lol.

On Sunday and again yesterday, I visited people and visited people, there was fun and laughter and food.  And different ages of people o, there were always older than my parents people and older than me people and sometimes younger than me people and everyone having a laughing-good-time.  And I guess, great advice for me, something like that.
Also yesterday, dad helped me change the light in my room.  I'm the electrical engineer.  But.  Funny.

I am trying to get a job so I need to email and do things like that.  Specifically, somebody gave me some people to email to connect me with a job abroad.  Somebody told me recently that I had a "fantastic" CV and that has given me such a nice feeling.  I did the fantastic CV because an old friend asked me to use a rΓ©sumΓ©-building website so I did.
I spoke with a former colleague on the phone and he's connecting me for a job in Naija and he also told me how to do things to put "affiliate marketing" on my books or blogs but I checked out the sites and got confused.
I'm highlighting the impact of people because this is my concreteness post, isn't it?

I noticed my phone getting a mind of its own so this morning I looked at things about hacking and found out that I haven't changed my google password like since the beginning of time.  I will have to change it.  Maybe in a changing ceremony with tears of an era passing.
Then I found that something called clearing the cache of your phone operating system could help bounce off the hacker(s) so I pushed myself to do that rather than just sit back and say whatever it's not like I have money for them to steal looool.
Then I started becoming more hyper, started doing more: changed my phone device security from the minimum default pin code to (I'm not telling youuuu) and then tested it and then found out about SIM card PINs and debated whether to lock my sim and then I pushed myself to not be all-contemplation and no action then I decided to change the sim pin then LOL I locked myself out of the sim because I didn't know it and used the wrong things three times.  So now I had to get the PUK to unlock it, so I found out that it's something that's printed on the plastic packaging of the sim that this awesome girl at the phone shop had said I should not throw away.  (I really like the phone shop customer service girl so I'm going to go back to phone shop just to make friends.  She's really into phones, technical stuff about phones, and yeah, I don't think she'll be doing 'just' customer service for much longer.)  
So now I had to find the PUK, an eight-digit number.  It took many minutes because it wasn't in the old cellphone box where I keep old phone stuff or in the tiny purse where I once kept sim card fragments.  Hmm, I was thinking I'd have to use customer service (phone or much better go to the office) then I remembered I kept it somewhere REALLY VERY EASY to find, yay, then I found it then I entered it and now could lock, unlock I mean, and then I ended up deciding not to use the lock sim in the end, because - long story, but basically more password-using and it's not adding very much new safety anyway.  I may change my mind and activate the sim card pin and all that.   
While I was sorting these phone things out, maybe 1-2 hours this morning of reading help pages and forums, I had a notepage (Sticky Notes) on my laptop where I wrote out what I was doing and deciding to do, what I was trying and deciding to not try -- to keep track and not get muddled.  
For example: 
what i did: cleared cache 609MB, change device pin - it prompts twice, test startup pins,   also wanna: change google password since April 2006.  not doing: add sim card pin because too much pin-pin and sim card stolen in other ways.  update - tried to and now locked out until i can add 8digit puk. 
And at the end I wrote:
OK.  I feel like i was 'busy' this morning.  Not necessarily productive, but definitely morally hardworking aka up-and-doing.  Whether or not I improved security in my digital life, I learned a few things about my devices.  Now to stop before I make things worse.     

Actual things that I did, saw, bought, and so on...
Well, now you know that I hung out a bit, had a bit of a concrete existence/experience of life.  
What did I see?  Usually my room.  Also the roads and places and stuff.  
What I "bought" was supposed to be a joke but hey, as it turns out, I'm on the market for a Benzoyl Peroxide thing to drop on pimples when they appear.  
It must have been 10, 12, nooo more like 18 years ago my former secondary school mate who became a biochemical engineer and is now like a pharmaceutical researcher said those words to me and since then I've kept one, then another Benzoyl Peroxide ointment/cream - the second one was a little tube of Mary Kay stuff and I kept it for many years - my First Aid for "acne" aka pimples.  I haven't had one for many years now but I haven't usually had pimples.  Nowadays though, well, I got one big one yesterday, and I remember I got a few - one or two at a time - in the past few months and had nothing to use on them and tried things I had on hand - mostly menthol balm - that I knew wouldn't work.  I've tried a number of pharmacies over the years - casually, like when a pimple appears and I think about it - and they don't have stuff with that active ingredient.  But now that I remember that it could be a cosmetic, I should check like perfume and 'beauty' stores for a lucky break.  I looked online and oxy-10 contains it.  Then I was scared of the brand from bad publicity I remember from a really long time ago I think about how they used celebrity influencers (before they were called influencers) to advertise with personal testimonies that were false testimonies i.e. they actually used doctors but claimed it was this facewash or whatever that cleared their dramatically severe acne.  I don't want a facewash anyway, I need a thing that I can apply to the affected area, and I guess keep for 10 years to use whenever I need it.  Oh, I just checked and it was Proactiv that had the bad PR and/or bad practices.  Oxy-10 is good and fine.  I see online that it's popular, with other brands like Clearasil, Neutrogena, Clean&Clear, etc, etc.

And I should stop stressing about things: no stress, no pimples.
Also, no fast-food, no pimples.
But it's when you stress that you get attracted to junk food lol.  And it's when I stress that I don't sleep enough and drink enough water and then I eat groundnuts or whatever hahahaha. 

I'll do laundry today or tomorrow and check out the beauty-related shops for the ointment thing.  Laundry is another concrete thing - I like the laundry place.
Oooh, money is another concrete thing - I am nearing zero with money now but someone's going to lend me some, payable when able, that's the good life y'all.  I'll pay back when I get back to doing a job whether bigly paid or acada-paid, like, in a few months.

I did things that I usually do, of course: watch Colbert and lots of late-night comedy on youtube.  Stephen Colbert, Seth Meyers, Trevor Noah, Jimmy Kimmel, that whole crew lol.  But this week I also watched a lot of Jim Jefferies' and watched a few more Bill Burr comedy bits.  And probably I read a lot of internet news and stuff and tried to read a book or two (cue the song: The Best Book To Read is the Biiiible).  Ah yes I went to church and I liked it.  Very much.  2 Chronicles 20 - the basis of Sunday's sermon - is good stuff.

Now I'm yawning.  It's time to add some pictures and stop boring myself, stop boring you.

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Thursday, August 08, 2019

It was always dance


Year One, one of these dancers was me.  Guess which one? 
Ballet - Swan Lake


Year Two, I was a girl again.
Music - "Los Toreadors"
Dance - Not a paso doble.

 ~  *  ~  
It is always metaphor with me these days, isn't it?
One of the things I'm suggesting to myself these days is to try concreteness in life as an antidote to excessive abstraction and even mysticism.
Concrete things like, I don't know, speaking directly with people, working directly with people, fighting directly with people lol, and so on.

If I really mean to practise concreteness, one supporting practice could be to write in this blog daily for a while, recording actual things that I did, saw, bought, and so on.  A first-order, direct experience journal.  (There are no actual things or so it would seem.  Hmmm, maybe there are some. )

But that's not often what I do here:  I write (1-3 times a month usually, and have done so for so many years) and the writing is often about ideas, art, thoughts, impressions - a higher-order recording of events in my life (and liberty and happiness.)


Metaphor is great and all, but sometimes the mind wants to rest and the body wants a workout.  It would be nice to actually dance, you know?  Then the body gets what it wants.  Instead of talking about how it was always dance and diving into metaphor, again.


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Thursday, July 25, 2019

Some people have a fear of failure.

I feel differently: failure (whatever that means) only extends the adventure; it presents the opportunity to experience a broader variety of gems, presumably including the so-called success.

Does that make sense to you?

I was thinking the other day about my considerable fear of success.  Why would anyone want to put success-blockers in their own path? 
For me, it's
1. An awareness of how success provokes Jealousy and
2. An awareness of how Disappointing achievement can be sometimes.
As a remedy, I try to First define success rigorously so that maybe it is broader, you know, in harmony, and leading to more happiness all around.  That's not the only way to do it, for sure.

I'll be back.  Peace.

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